randomly 2#

as i scroll down my posts yang dulu2,,
and as i read the comments there,,,
sometimes i feel irritated? tak puas hati? dengan anon2 yg drop comment,, not so many but there were some,,

i guess i know those anons and i guess they know me too,,
since the way they spelled some words make me thinking of some people around me,,,
yela,, kalau kita dah biasa taip seome words using our own special way, u know what i mean,,
i guess by any chance u forgot that u dont want others to recognize u and u just dah terbiasa taip macam tu kan,,,

aku tak salahkan anon2 yang drop komen and aku takde hak nk marah anon2 tu tak kenalkan diri as tu adalah hak privasi mereka,,,
but dont be such a cynical one,,,
kalaupun kau rasa annoyed dengan tulisan aku, or kau rasa aku over sangat then dont read it,,
if those anons know me la,,,

because i am a hypocrite and i know there's a lot of hypocriters out there, dalam bahasa lembutnya orang2 yang tak mahu orang lain tahu apa yang dia fikirkan tentang orang tu,,,
i try to be honest with myself,,,
and i know sometimes it's hard for me to tell some people how i really feel (especially the negative one)about them,, and lastly i always kept those feeling inside my head, and at a point my face will show it,,
at that point everything gonna ruin up,,,
and i guess i know some people who kept  things from me,,,
but, leave them alone.. as i need to improve myself, barulah aku boleh komplen orang lain,,,

i guess it's better to not be honest to those people who dont know me very well, as i think they will misjudge me,,
there are some people whom i can be honest 100% with them, joke yang melampau pun okay je, the most important thing is that i can tegur them on the spot if aku tak berkenan dengan apa yang mereka buat,,
and i hope they will be the same to me,,
and aku rasa mereka pernah je sindir2 aku pasal something tak elok yang aku buat,,,

aku rasa tu lah kawan sebenar,,
kawan bila gembira, kawan bila sedih,,
i have some, and i'm glad i have them,,
for some reason, i treasure them more than those who spend more time with me,,,
for some reason, there is a bond that keep us together no matter how long, how far, how silence there are between us,,,

i think there are some who think of me their kawan ketika susah and senang,,,

deep down i do care about things that seem like i do not care

but again i think too much and no action,,,
that's why i look like an ignorance,,,
and i know, i'm not good enough to be the person who u can talk over everything,,

just because i lack of expression doesnt mean that i lack of feeling,,,

just there is only some people who i can open myself up fully, and to the rest just half-opened~
a reminder to myself--- dont shut yourself to anyone, because u dont know when will u need them~